Bullpen Game

Preamble:

Welp, that was a morning. It started with a very lonely trek down and up Branch Valley for our sole prerunner. Abandoned, but not forsaken, he conquered and received a special medal from Strava for who knows what.

It turns out that “abandoned and conquering” would be the theme for our PAX this morning as our Q-to-be didn’t show. The ol’ Q-sack. I think I’d much rather Q-sack than Cusack, but it sounds the same when you say it out loud. Anyway, keeping to our strict anti-cyberbullying policies here at the Gladiator, we won’t mention (black) who didn’t show up (box). At around 0513 (that’s 5:13am), we started prepping for a bullpen game. 0515 came around and we began hoping that it would be game 4 instead of game 5.

Warm-O-Rama:

YHC started with warmup and asked the Pax to prep roughly 8-minute sets that we could rotate leading. And yes, in this case, I’m claiming to be Zack Greinke. Hopefully.

It was an extended warmup, staying in the parking lot for about 10 minutes in case ol’ Q-to-be showed up. Spoiler alert: he didn’t.

SSH, weed pickers, imperial walkers, MNC, copper head squats, and diamonds. Note to future Q’s: Weed Pickers should be slow. You’re warming up, not slipping a disk.

We then did some back and forths on the parking lot with broad jumps, bear crawls, lunges, stretches, diamond merkins…just kinda whatever I could steal from Dreamer’s BD last Thursday.

The Thang:

Vertigo: run behind the gym. At first, I thought he was going to take us back to the library to do more burpees with campaign signs, but alas, no. We grabbed some space on the wall and did:

• 5 balls to walls(B2W), 10 burpees, run to the splash pad and back
• 4 B2W, 8 burpees, run
• 3 B2W, 6 burpees, run
• Continuing down to: 1, 2, run.

Spandex: Run to the grassy hill on the backside of the flag for 7s.

• Bottom: 1 backside-exfoliating Big Boy Sit-up
• Top: 6 Hop Squats.
• Then do 7s…

Laces: Run to the pitch. No, that’s a “p”. Mucho Chesto at each corner of the field.

• Corner 1: 10 Merkins, 10 Diamond Mercans, 10 Wide Pushups, 10 Merquins Staggered-one-way, 10 Staggered-the-other-way
• Corner 2: 8 Merkins, 8 Diamond Mercans, 8 Wide Pushups, 8 Merquins Staggered-one-way, 8 Staggered-the-other-way
• Corner 3: 6 Merkins, 6 Diamond Mercans, 6 Wide Pushups, 6 Merquins Staggered-one-way, 6 Staggered-the-other-way
• Corner 4: 5Merkins, 5 Diamond Mercans, 5 Wide Pushups, 5 Merquins Staggered-one-way, 5 Staggered-the-other-way
• By the end, it was more like merCAN’Ts. This guy gets it.

Dreamer: Line up on the baseline. Sprint to the top of the box, Bernie to the red line, sprint to the other red line, Bernie to the top of the other box, sprint to the other baseline. Mosey back. Repeat. Repeat again.

Then, do 3 laps around the box alternating side shuffle and Bernies. Pretty sure Dreamer was getting us in the mood for mid-terms.

Then, back to the flag for Mary…who apparently was a cheerleader because Brownie just had us do cheerleaders until time.

COT:

ZOHAN AND MRS. ZOHAN ARE CITIZENS!!!!!!!

Vertigo’s job!

2.0 Convergence at Nirvana

Naked-Man Moleskin:

Holy moly that was a beatdown. And it was a successful bullpen game. The good guys beat the bad guys like the bad guys would beat their trash cans. We need to do that more often. Democratized Qs. Well, really it was more of a Constitutional Republicized Q because there were still only a few guys that Qed… Zohan gets it.

Great being out there with y’all this morning. See you next week.

Scratch-off Out.