T-Day Football with the Alphas

When: 11/24/16

QIC: Tom Turkey

PAX (): Team Bullwhips: Hot Sauce, Slater, Candyland, Nawlins FNG, The Body, Fondue 2.0 #1, Clyde, Clyde 2.0, Miller Time Team Cansecos: Cookie, DoSiDo, Fondue, Fondue 2.0 #2, Nawlins FNG 2.0, Foghorn, Harley Quin, Wurly, Wurly 2.0, BabyFace, Crack, Kion

The weather was glorious as #widowmaker hosted the first of many F3 football games throughout the #nation on this splendid Turkey Day. 57°F with winds out of the SW/WSW at 4-7 MPH. Those winds should not affect the trajectory of any point after attempts, but the lack of goal posts would definitely prove to be a challenge. As per the norm, F3 doers are the only people out this time of the AM. PAX from all around the Alpha came to partake: some regulars, some seen only during 2nd F libations, a few FNGs from Nawlins care of Fondue, and 2.0s galore; 21 in total. All three weekdays AOs were represented. Success! Team Captain Cookie and unwilling Team Captain Hot Sauce divvy out the sides, once Cookie knows his team, he gives the rules to each PAX one by one sharing different stories for his blue flag counterparts, COT for count-o-rama and name-o-rama and a quick prayer of Thanksgiving. Now, on to the play-by-play:

Team Blue, later know as the #bullwhips, selected to receive first. We found out quickly that the whips would play slowly. Who huddles prior to EVERY play when a bunch of old men get together for football? The whips, thats who. They remind me of my old man church softball team that had a no practice = no play philosophy. Needless to say, I didn’t last on the church team and I am also glad I wasn’t on team sissywhips. After determining who’s SpeedStick made the huddle smell most fresh along with the best way to decorate sweet potato pie, they finally decide to start with a run game. I fell asleep for the next 10 minutes, but somewhere within the 1.5 plays that were run during that time, Team Red, i.e. the #Cansecos, gets the ball. DiSiDo starts as the play caller, the obvious choice with this Pats gear on. While he drove to a touchdown on the first play, the inflated football was toooooo full, and a couple of outerceptions had him shed that silly jersey. Understandably so, his critical game tying safety came without said jersey… remember that.

Let’s move on to the Cliff Notes version of the game, but first, I want to thank the linemen that so often get left off the play-by-play but are so key to the success of any given team. Great work Fondue! Hot Sauce thought we had a rugby match today and barrelled his way through everyone, including a couple 65 lb 2.0s that considering grabbing his flags. That same Hot Sauce apparently thought all “flags” were in play. Its a good thing his gloves lacked proper tackiness and couldn’t hold a thing including that “thing.” Candyland and Foghorn matched up like it was AJ Green and Julio on the field. Foghorn even spent half the game playing with the little 2.0s and still racked up around 30 catches. Babyface excelled for the Cansecos while doubling as a rather stellar line judge. Slater supplied good jams and fast boy soccer arm speed. Wurly and Cookie played their own game of catch on the field, seemed to never throw it past the line of scrimmage, but it worked. When Nawlins FNG wasn’t squared up with Fondue, he made a crucial interception for the whips. Miller Time was all over the field and was also surprising effective at kicking off for the Whips. Either that, or the Cansecos kickoff plan lacked organization. When not being run over by Hot Sauce, those 2.0 made some killer plays, but the game really came down to The Body and his arm. In OT, the Cansecos had a couple of opportunities to take the V. That didn’t happen. Instead 7’6″ Clyde barely out-lept 5’2″ Crack in the end zone to reel in the game winning float from The Body: game over.

Hopefully everyone can return to the Widowmaker on Saturday to re-live the glory. Our main man and brü, Mufasa, will surely bring some fun worth being a part of.

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