Jumping at the chance to Q, I quickly took over the beatdown from Yogi who had a work conflict. I had been saving this German inspired workout for just such an occasion. While stationed in Virginia I had the chance to train with some of the German military and they introduced me their version of the physical fitness test so I adapted it for our beatdown. After a little recon to open the stadium and set everything up, we moseyed to the far side of the track just outside of the pull-up bars. Time for the warm-up!
Sich Warm Laufen (Warm Ups)
SSH x 15 IC
Windmills x 15 IC
Hillbillies x 15 IC
Die Sache (The Thang)
Remaining in the circle formation, the PAX counted off to be placed in 1 of 2 teams. Once divided, I gave out the instructions for the first 2 events.
Event 1 – Flexarm hängen (The Flex Arm Hang)
Modified from the original German fitness test, group 1 would line up in front of pull-up bars. At the start of the exercise they would perform a chin-up (wrists toward the body) and then hold their chin above the bar while the PAX in line counted to 10. After completion, the PAX would then rotate. The PAX rinsed and repeated until group 2 finished performing the second event.
Event 2 – The 800m Sprint
Also modified from the original German fitness test, group 2 would line up on the track outside of the pull-up bars and then on the command exercise they would sprint 800m. Once complete, the PAX would switch with group 1.
Once both groups had completed events 1 and 2, we did a quick 10-count before starting the next event. Both groups moseyed to the front-side of the football field for event 3.
Event 3 – The 5 x 10 Meter Sprint
In the spirit of the event, I had previously set up 2 buckets (1 for each group) that were 10 meters (that’s 10.9361 in American yards) from the goal line. Modified a little for competitive purposes, I instructed the PAX that they would be racing each other to complete the exercise and the winner would get a card. The PAX were to begin by lying on their stomachs at the goal line with their hands behind their back. On the command ‘Go’ they would push off and start sprinting to the bucket on the 10 meter line and then circle back to the goal line where they would have to get back on their stomachs and clap their hands behind their back before taking off again. They would perform 5 full rotations of this and then on the final sprint, the PAX would sprint to the 25 yard line to another bucket I had set up for the finish. The winner was awarded a card.
The goal was to beat the other team and collect as many cards as you can because each card has a set of exercises on them. After all the PAX had competed, the cards were gathered and the groups switched the cards they had accumulated. Thus, the winning group had to perform less exercises than the losing group. The exercises were in standard Deck of Death format as follows:
Spades – Squats
Clubs – Freedie Mercurys
Hearts – Partner Rows
Diamonds – Door Pulls (Very unsuccessful using another PAX. Would recommend doing these against a fixed structure next time)
When the battle was over, group 1 came out victorious with 4-3. Next time, to simplify things I might have the losing team partner carry the winning team across the field as punishment.
Finishing the German physical fitness test, we still had plenty of time to burn. The PAX headed over to the bleachers to perform 11’s. Splitting the PAX between the bottom and the top to eliminate confusion we performed 1 Dip at the bottom and 10 Merkins at the top until completion. After another quick 10 count, we moseyed back to the flag for some last minute Mary.
Waiting on the 6, we performed LBC’s until we had everyone and then we wrapped up the morning with a modified Ring of Fire. The PAX held a Bicep Plank (plank with wrists turned out-ward) while 1 PAX performed 10 Carolina Drydocks. We made it through all 12 PAX right as 6:15 rolled in.
Kreis des Vertrauens (COT)
Amicalola remote beatdown TBD
Do-si-doh breakfast and speaking on Saturday at 9 am at Antioch church
Refer to the email Babyface sent out regarding all of the upcoming F3 events.
Prayers for healing those that are ailing: Cricket’s M as she is resting up from a recent scare from her pregnancy, Frenchie and his knee, Hombre with a calf injury, and any others with any physical or emotional ailments they are suffering at this time
Thank you all for the continued support and motivation. I know for a fact I wouldn’t be out there in the mornings alone. I’m happy to report that I’m making good on my birthday resolution for the month of April (32 beatdowns before April 28th!). At this point I am only 2 beatdowns behind so I’ll be looking for some afternoon beatdowns to catch up (either biking or trail running). For those traveling to the Paragon tomorrow, SYITG. For everyone else, see you Saturday at the Hurt Locker for the pre-ruck and the beatdown!
The information in this backblast is true and complete to the best of my knowledge. All translations are made without guarantee to their accuracy. They are merely for situational and humorous purposes. It would actually be funnier if they were wildly incorrect. The author disclaims any liability whatsoever. 🙂